Hello Parents! Welcome to the parent connection! Highpoint Student Ministries is in the early stages of developing a "parent equipping center" through which we will be able to partner with you in helping your student become all that God wants them to be. Recently, we held our first parent equipping meeting, where we talked through the concept of never giving up on fighting for relationship with your teenager. Whether you believe it or not your relationship with them STILL is the strongest influence they have in their life. They may not respond to you the way you would like for them to, but they do want your approval and they need to know that you still care enough to ask them the tough questions. We talked through some of these issues in depth at the meeting amongst others and hope to see you at future sessions!
Here are a few general tips that may help you understand how to view and approach your teen today.
Tips for Helping Your Child Transition From Dependence to Independence
(This is the foundation of what needs to happen during the teen years)
What Parents Want:
Teens to understand that they care.
To know what’s going on in their teens’ life.
Teen to realize that they are human, too.
Their kids to understand their values.
To be heard and to have their opinions acknowledged.
To be treated with respect.
Teens to ask for help when facing problems.
What Teenagers Want:
For parents to be willing to understand what it’s like being a teen today.
For parents to realize that it’s important for teens to have opportunities to practice making their own decisions.
For parents to participate in and stay involved in their lives.
For parents to show consideration for them and respect them.
For parents to be trustworthy and demonstrate integrity.
For parents to give their advice and opinions when asked for them.
For parents to understand that the teen’s friends are important.
For parents to stay connected with them so that they can feel their parents’ love. (Even when they don't act like it!)
Summary of the 10 predominant behavior traits found in teenagers:
They have short attention spans and get distracted easily.
They have lots of physical energy (prone to hyperactivity).
They are highly sensitive people with empathy and compassion.
They have a great need for attention and quality time.
They resist absolute authority (without dialogue and choice).
They are strong-willed and cannot be forced to do anything.
They have trouble bonding with others who are unlike themselves.
They are frustrated with the status quo and look for a better way.
They speak with conviction and will ask for what they want.
They sense hidden feelings and can get very angry when they feel insecurity or disrespect.
Resources:
Parent as Coach by Diana Haskins
Coach Your Teen To Succes by Barbara McRae
Common Sense Parenting by Boy’s Town Press
When To Worry: How To Tell If Your Teen Needs Help-And What To Do About It by Lisa Boesky
Suggestion?
Do you have a specific topic that you would like for us to consider for a future parent equipping session? Email your ideas to hpstudents@highpointmemphis.com.